When you're feeling angry it is often hard to stay calm, and can lead to saying things you don't really mean. Anger however is a secondary emotion. This means that when you are feeling angry it is because first you felt something like scared, hurt, frustrated, betrayed, etc..
Next time you are feeling angry during a conflict, think about why you feel angry and try to discover what primary emotion is behind it. This will help you address the real problem and find a solution that will actually solve the problem.
If you feel angry because your feelings were hurt by a comment your partner made for example, your anger can camouflage the real issue and the discussion can spiral out of control. After you have discovered the primary emotion make sure to stay on topic. Bringing up issues from the past and other grievances you have is not productive.
Conflict is a normal part of every relationship and should not be seen as a danger sign to the longevity of the relationship. Conflict itself is not bad, it is how you chose to handle it that brings about positive or negative outcomes. Here we have compiled some ideas and advice on how to turn that conflict into a positive experience for you and your partner. You can enjoy quotes, research, points to think about and more as you explore and keep up to date on this blog. Stay a while and enjoy!
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